You What???

Really wish I could elaborate on the story which I desperately want to write here. Unfortunately, discretion is going to prevent me from doing this. But let's just say I found the perfect picture to sum up the story and therefore I had to at least put that up!

Back to Blog!

It has been far too long since I entered into the world of the Lost in Libya blog. . my favourite form of reflection and escapism.

The reason for the blog being "shutdown" temporarily was due to the fact that I was indeed "discovered".

Apparently my blog comes up in google alerts for Libya. (Slightly proud, slightly mortified).

My complete inability to be anonymous means that even people I do not know, know that I am the phantom blogger.

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However, after serious consideration and numerous discussions and re-reading of my blog I have realised that there is nothing really offensive or risky discussed in my blog and it would be a shame for me to stop documenting my journey so, on that note.. . . . .

_

. . . . there is almost two months catch up on..

Viva La Blog

x

Montgomery Mountjoy Seamus McGuigan

Introducing Monty

Today's intention was to venture into the centre of Tripoli to purchase some new DVD's from the 1 and 1/2 dinar (75p) DVD store, where you can get good copies of good movies.

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However, due to the mice escapade, I ventured back into the horrific "pet abbatoir" I mentioned in my previous post "Of All the Pet Shops In The World" (dated Friday, April 3, 2009), in an attempt to buy some form of normal mouse traps for the little visitors to my apartment.

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I however, ended up with Monty. (And no DVD's or mousetraps!)

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Monty is a tiny little maltese terrier who looked barely alive in his cage when we initally stumbled upon him - he didn't respond to our attempts to rouse him by tapping on his cage and cooing at him.

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The heat, stench, noise and overbearing atmosphere of the crazy pet store made it impossible not to rescue this gorgeous little pup. (He was surrounded by overcrowed cages of animals, alsations barking with their heads hanging out of their chewed metal cages, a great hawk was sitting proudly on top of another cage with just a metal cuff on his leg). The workers in the shop care nothing for the animals, they will just pick any animal you are looking at out of the cage and throw them to the floor.

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Underfed, overheated, salivating with thirst, flea and tick ridden with patches of his hair missing Monty marched happily out of the pits of his hell with us and started his journey as the luckiest pup in Libya.

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Without even a glance back . . .

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After a good bath and a much needed shave to remove the matted clumps of hair on his body. This shows the state of his skin from the endless gnawing at the ticks, fleas and uncomfortable clumps.

Bugs, Jumping Spiders, Cockroaches and .....

MICE!!!
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As if the bugs, jumping spiders and hideous cockroaches were not enough to deal with, I now have mice!

This is due to the unfortunate humongous gap underneath my front door which seems to be a welcome sign for any creature to come in and bring their families, friends and associates in for a party. Not ideal for a complete paranoid android like myself who finds a wasp back in the UK very hard to deal with (much to the amusement of my lovely brother and sister who think I am the world's biggest chicken).

Given the fact that I have decided to move out to North Africa, I know a certain amount of "bug" toleration is mandatory but MICE??? Far too much for me to deal with....

I have had maintenance from my company around to my apartment to get rid of these delightful little visitors and the result has been a couple of Libyan mousetraps - a small square of cardboard, a huge dollop of extra strong superglue and a chunk of cheese. This means that said little mouse crawls up to get the cheese and then gets stuck in the glue and your job then is to kill the mouse by beating it over the head.

I'm not happy but am trying to maintain my cool.

For now.

Wimax Your Way Forward

Returning from London was made 10 times worse by the fact that I no longer had the usage of my neighbours wireless internet connection as he had moved to another apartment.

A week later however and I found my wireless saviour in Wimax.

It cost me 550 Libyan Dinars for a years subscription. (Which is the equivalent to £274 - and therefore a monthly cost of approximately £22) Not cheap conisdering where I am but at the same time it is perfect for me and keeps me connected.

Wimax speeds vary but as a whole it is quick (certainly alot quicker than the adsl provided here) and it is reliable. I have had about 3 occasions where the wimax was down and this usually is at times when the rest of the mobile and internet networks are having issues.

Highly recommend this as a source of internet for anyone who comes to live in Tripoli for a year or over. No phoneline necessary, just a plug in dongle which you can take with you anywhere.

For more details go to:

http://libyamax.ly/main_en.htm

Filing Cabinet Safety Tips

Always remember to open only one drawer at a time.
.
Opening all drawers at once leaves one at risk of looking like a silly blonde twat, jammed in between an enormous collapsed filing cabinet and a desk, with a very red face, a scratched chest and a hysterical assistant.

(One of those things which will only ever happen once!)

Summer is Coming..

I have certainly picked the hottest place to be, in fact the highest temperature ever recorded on earth was 57.8° C (136°F) in Libya.

Due to the sweltering heat in the summer my working hours have changed today for the next 4 months.

I start at the same time - 7:30am but now finish an hour earlier at 3pm. Absolutely delighted with the change and the only minor negative difference is we now have a half hour lunch at 13:00.

Not a biggie considering today I got to chillout by an outdoor pool, swim 11 lengths and then stuff my face afterwards.

Libya Continues World Image Makeover

http://www.cbsnews.com/blogs/2009/05/13/world/worldwatch/entry5011881.shtml

Fire! Fire! Fire!

Well health & safety executives in the UK would have been appalled at the so called fire drill which took place at my work today.

At lunch time the fire alarm went off, so instantly I was scarpering out of the building without my personal belongings. As I walked down the hall alone I began to wonder if I was following an incorrect procedure but once outside I found a minute gathering of Western people waiting for the all clear. The designated meeting point for fire drills was blocked up by a humongous 4x4 SUV and there was no name check whatsoever (well considering that the other 1,000+ Libyan employees were still within the building it would have been a complete waste of time).

Right or So Wrong?

Alas, I am a hypocrite. My secret judgmental opinion prior to my arrival on Libyan soil was that people who have cleaners were people who thought that their own “poop” did not stink and I was pretty disgusted that they were happy enough to pay a few bob to have their own mess cleaned up and not bother to do it themselves.

I however, have fallen in to the trap and must eat my own words.

The heat and workload in Libya barely gives me enough energy to cook a meal, let alone start scrubbing the walls and floors. (The first week is not included when I went on the ultimate cleaning, bleaching & polishing domestic goddess binge). So, I have hired a cleaner who comes around to my apartment once a week. She is a lovely Morroccan lady who does not speak a word of English but has a soft smile and a gentle manner (and the fact that none of my valuables have gone missing is an added bonus). I feel so embarrassed that she is cleaning up after me that I have a clean up the night before she comes and I also leave out cakes and crisps and food for her to eat while she is at my house. She arrives at early o’clock and leaves after 5pm and her charge for a days work is 25 LYD . . . which is the equivalent to £12.40 per day, that is £49.60 per month. She cleans absolutely everything, including my duvet and irons my socks. This is a complete luxury to me and one which I was completely against prior to my visit here, and I feel like an absolute hypocrite as I was so against my previous partner having a cleaner back in the UK but at the same time I feel unable to complete anything after work due to my hectic work schedule and the unbelievable heat!

One of the arguments FOR having a cleaner is that it is providing employment to someone who earns very little in Libya and is grateful for all the work that they get...

At the same time I can’t help but think...

Am I participating in exploitation or am I contributing to her personal gain or the economy by employing her?

Wonderous Weekends

Yet again, I have had a fabulous weekend and a lovely Saturday spent down by the beach. The added bonus to this weekend was an amazingly handsome dog (well he is like a person really) called Bertie Ahern. Bertie is a delightful little maltese terrier who I managed to play Mum to for the weekend as his Mummy is away in Morrocco. He is so playful and must be a great companion to his owner, as he is so loyal and hates to be alone - he follows you around when you walk around the house & loves to be petted and cuddled lots and lots.

I think I've fallen in love ...

Mother & Son Reunited

Today was a big day for my neighbour, her 22 year old son arrived in Libya for the first time to visit for a week. To celebrate his arrival she arranged a big barbeque for him and invited lots of people - there were 34 confirmed. After the major stresses and hassles with arranging his visa it was so nice to see him finally reunited with his Mother on Libyan soil.

However, the stresses did not end there. An enormous amount of preparation went into the barbeque (this included buying a new splendid barbeque (second hand which therefore mean't it needed a good scrub), marinating copious amounts of lamb & chicken, the huge shopping expedition to stock up on food stuffs & goodies, sourcing gas cylinders, chairs & tables etc.

After all of that, it turned out that it was most certainly the wrong day to be holding the BBQ , the security on our Regatta compound would not let anybody in as there was a VIP staying on the compound. In fact, they decided to forget completely even who residents were and we were forced to go get our ID to prove who we were. (This actually is a regular occurence, the head of security has seen my pass and met me on plenty of occasions but still has his power trip days where I'm forced to be interrogated in order to get to my apartment) Even though the majority of the party were turned away by the Regatta Mafia, the barbeque still turned out to be a fun event, and there was certainly triple, if not quadruple portions of food available.

Happy Birthday Mum!

Hope you have a wonderful day today Mum.. Thinking of you!

You're famous now, in an anonymous way on lostinlibya blogspot.

Love you lots

xxxxxx

Medina Madness..

I ventured back into what is known as the "Medina" in Tripoli today. The Medina is basically a walled medieval market with a few odd bits thrown in, it's a mixture of old and new and I can see it being a paradise for the antique and jewellery conniseur.

(Note - the Medina is smack bang in the centre of Tripoli, sort of a wierd version of Oxford Street to us Londoners)

Despite the dreaded drive throught "DEATH ROUNDABOUT" - (believe it when you see it) I still managed to feel quite guilty that I was more interested in what was in my stomach when I arrived. Luckily I ended up in the most fabulous traditional restaurant which served plenty of bread, a lovely tomato mozzarella salad and an extremely delicious, tender Tajin of Mouton (Lamb) to fill the gap.

Afterwards, I did a very minimal amount of “touristic” shopping (shame on me) – purchasing framed dead scorpions, key rings & Libyan t-shirts for the fam (that's the designer gear you're getting from Libya Bro & Sis).

It's a Hard Life..

I actually live here now?

But someone has to do it..

I have had the most perfect weekend and despite the flaws of Libya and being away from home,right now I feel blessed to be in a “sort of”paradise..

Well, sun, sea, a terrace sun lounger, fantastic “old / new skool” company - does it really get much better than that?

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

I stumbled across an extremely huge sea turtle today on a walk along the beach. I could never have imagined a turtle of this proportion but unfortunately my first experience of seeing this amazing creature was seeing her deteriorating and rotting away on the shore.

Absolutely amazed at the size but also extremely disturbed to have found out that she was more than likely harpooned at sea. Reading further into turtle torture is really sad, all native species of West Indian sea tortoises are now extinct!

However, turtle meat being considered a delicacy and the high commerical value of the shell means that people will continue to endanger the fascinating sea turtle...

Libyan Ladies Lunch

Clearly Not "Salame"..

My office is based in the middle of nowhere - the only options for food are:

1. Bring your own. 2. Camel or Tuna 1/2 dinar baguettes. OR 3. Risk going through the local council estate (much better than the ones I've seen in London mind you) to get to the local greasy burger joint. So three of the younger Libyan secretaries planned an escape lunch for me today whilst all the management were in a meeting. One of them had a car, so we all jumped in as she "boy raced" her way through town to a really nice, upper class Italian restaurant down Gargaresh road (the Rodeo Drive of Tripoli).

Not only did they insist on me choosing where we sat and what we ate, they would not let me pay a penny towards the meal. I am so unbeliveably touched by the hospitality of the Libyans, they are so generous, kind and sweet (apart from the pervy men of course).

Anyway, one of the pizza dishes I ordered was "salame" - which I though would be a laugh but when it arrived I had a tiny panic attack as I thought it could actually be pork salami and then I would end up fired and extradited from the country, working for a Governmental Oil Company. No fear there, the "salame" was a completely disgusting slimy Turkish Halal version of pork which was enjoyed by all. Along with a pizza smothered in calamari & prawns and some very strange looking green jellyish pizza. Bar the food, I had a wonderful brief lunch and journey to and from the restaurant - even though I didn't understand a word that the girls were saying, I have a feeling I've made a few friends.

May Day

Attended another expat event today but actually had a very memorable and amusing time. It was the annual darts competition in which over 200 expats from all over the world came to watch. The Filipino expats seem to take the event extremely serious, whilst the British/American/Irish tend to prefer the social aspect.

Anyway, it was good fun watching everyone get thrown in the pool whilst I sat back and relaxed.

Have also realised.......I'm not a big fan of darts, they are actually for farts.

A chop too far..

What the hell was I thinking going to have my hair cut at a Libyan hairdressers?????

I have officially got short hair having had 6 inches chopped right off within the space of two minutes (it literally was “chop” “chop”). So I am lucious locks no more. Initially I was in a bit of a strop, having walked out afterwards without even having a blow dry (mind you that wasn’t just the haircut - the screaming baby and blow dry queue were a real deal breaker).

Oh well, I have resigned myself to the new bouffant and am quite happy without the length in this heat, regardless of the disastrous style. (My hairdresser would have a heart attack!)

After the hairdressers I took on another adventure - a taxi home alone for the first time. Will NOT be doing that again!

My neighbour was slightly worried and told me that I MUST wear sunglasses in the car. Thinking she was being a bit of a paranoid mother figure I ignored her advice and left them sitting on top of my head. BIG MISTAKE!

I have now had my first marriage proposal (which I politely declined) but also almost lost my life as the driver drove at full speed whilst turning around to shout "Wow Boootiful Eyes"! Very amusing in hindsight...

All in a days work!

Wish Me Luck..

I'm going to get my haircut in Libya tomorrow!